The Potions Master's Assistant
by everythingmeanssomething
Summary: The Potions Master has an assistant and this is her story. Slightly AU, Original OC, all in character. Not the best summary, but please read.
1. Prologue

**Disclaimer: Any characters you recognize are not mine.**

"Just correct the papers and don't give anyone points they don't deserve." That's my boss. The one and only Severus Snape, Potions Master at Hogwarts, ex-Death Eater, Spy for the Order of the Phoenix, and snark-extraordinaire.

You may ask why a pureblood witch is working as Severus Snape's assistant. One thing you need to understand is that Severus wasn't the only spy the Order had during the war with Voldemort. My parents both were as well. My mother saved Severus' life once from a stray Killing Curse, and my father was killed when he was discovered. My mother asked Severus and Dumbledore to keep an eye on me and protect me, as she assumed her time would be approaching as well. She was right and I became an orphaned child at the age of thirteen in my third year at Hogwarts.

The _Prophet _followed my teen years far more closely than most other children affected by the war, due in part to the amount of money left to me, as well as the businesses. Not may thirteen-year-olds are worth over twenty million galleons. Despite the fact that I was a Slytherin, Dumbledore always treated me as if I was his own daughter or niece. He always said it was because I shared the name of his younger sister, Ariana, who died as a child. Personally, I think it has to do with the guilt of the fact that my parents were discovered during a mission he sent them on.

So here I sit, Ariana Sparks, correcting essays written by dunderheads. This isn't my term, but rather Severus' endearment for them. Several of them do seem to have potential, for lack of better term. Throughout childhood, and even now, people choose to compare my 'potential' to all that my parents did to better the wizarding community. It was with this in mind that I sold off all stocks of the corporations my parents owned, in hopes of deterring people from comparing me to my dead mother and father.

It didn't work.

I suppose that's part of my reason for becoming Severus' assistant. Of course, I'm not supposed to refer to him as Severus, at least no in front of the students. He prefers the title 'Professor Snape' or 'Sir'. Once, he joked that 'Master' was perfectly fine as well. At least, I think it was a joke. The corner of his mouth turned up. However, after a few time of having to lecture me about calling him by his given name, he permits me to call him Severus in the lab, away from others. He doesn't seem to mind so much anymore, if the tight line his lips form is any indication. It seems that's the way they are permanently set.

There have only been two instances when I have seen more than a wan smile on his face: first, when I tripped on a stool, causing him to smirk. He hadn't been wearing his teaching robes at the time, just black slacks and a white button-down shirt. It didn't take a Legilimens to realize I was shocked and pleased to see what he looked like without the large robe on. It was during the time that I was lost in my reverie that I tripped on the stool. The second time he actually laughed at a joke I made. I can't even recall what the joke entailed, but it caused me to see him in a different light, if only for a moment. For that instant, he transformed from the snarky, brooding, dark haired professor into a man, a living man capable of feelings and human reactions.

Afterwards, however, he went back to his typical self, though fewer scathing remarks were aimed at myself.

It's now time for fourth year potions. Two Gryffindor girls are waving about a copy of _Witch Weekly_, headline proclaiming that Severus and I have a secret relationship. Times like these force me to wonder if Severus' term 'dunderheads' truly describes some students. Severus confiscates the paper and, (_'Who would have guessed?'_ I think sarcastically.) I see that it's written by Rita Skeeter. I despise that wretched cow. She's been writing articles suspiciously similar to this one for years now. Even some of the paragraphs look as though they were taken from those previous slandering articles. It started in my fourth year, a truly disgusting person she was. Why would he risk everything, his own integrity included, to have an affair with a student? Whenever the _Daily Prophet_ wasn't willing to pay for the pieces, she'd take it to _Witch Weekly _or any other tabloid that would take the story.

He once hexed her, you know. Forget the previous count, Severus has smiled three times. She somehow managed to sneak into his classroom and cast a Disillusionment charm. He caught her when she took a picture. She got rather close and the shimmer from the charm made her presence obvious. Needless to say, he was furious, smashing the camera, torching the film inside, and even going so far as to emboss PEST' on her forehead, something she would be sporting for at least a week afterward.

"Thank you," I told him, after she left the school.

"Don't flatter yourself," was the response. "I didn't do it for you, I don't want the dunderheads to be anymore distracted than they already are." Everything was silent for about five minutes. "But you're welcome," he muttered, barely loud enough to hear.

"**House Guest" is temporarily postponed until I come up with some more ideas for the next chapter, but I'm currently working on it. What do you think of this story though? Please review.**


	2. Cornish Pixies

**Disclaimer: I only own my original OC, not Harry Potter.**

**Thanks to everyone that reviewed. I know it took a while to update, but I had exams the past two weeks. **

_Bam!_ The door to the classroom slammed open. It was always easy to tell when Severus was angry, you could hear him coming from one hallway away, with the doors being yanked open forcefully only to collide with the wall.

"What's happened now?" I asked, not looking up from the papers I was correcting. Four years of working as his assistant have made me immune to his temper.

"It's that bloody idiot Lockhart! Who else would be dumb enough to release Cornish Pixies into a room full of students?" he fumed.

"Was anyone harmed?" I queried, looking up. His eyes looked even darker than they usually did.

"No, but that's not the point."

"Well, at least everyone was okay." In spite of myself, I always tried to get him to see the positive side. It almost never worked.

"Of course you would try to defend him! He is your boyfriend after all!"

"He is not! That's not who I'm attracted to at all!" I shouted back. Honestly, he could be so impossible during his brooding spells.

"Right, and that's why ever since he took the teaching job, he's constantly around you."

"It's not my doing. Besides, he keeps giving me a lecture on being a 'proper' celebrity. 'Fame is a fickle friend' and all that nonsense. He's a bloody idiot!"

"Thank you! Was that so difficult to say?" He didn't wait for a reply before storming back out, slamming the door behind him. I rolled my eyes and went back to grading. He always knew how to trick me into agreeing with him. Not that I didn't anyway. Gilderoy Lockhart had been trying to 'woo' me for months now, ever since I had the misfortune of meeting him during summer. Dumbledore had been so convinced it would be helpful for everyone if we met him ahead of time, before the school year started.

I always declined. He had made it very clear, unintentionally, that he only wanted me for the publicity it would bring. 'Just consider it, we'd be the couple of the year. Witch Weekly would follow us everywhere.'

'Witch Weekly follows me everywhere already, thank you very much Gilderoy, but alas, the answer is no.'

I was pulled out of my reverie by a knock on the door. "May I come in?" asked a certain professor named Lockhart. I never could get him to leave me alone. It's not like I tell him anything. Most of the time I ignore him really. He talks and I see if I can count how many bones are in my body.

"Sure, I can't think of an excuse why not." It was the truth. Try as I might I couldn't think of a single thing to keep him out, other than, "You bloody idiot, leave me alone!" No, far too cruel. He'd give me that look that makes me feel like I've just kicked a puppy.

"I don't suppose you've heard about my near-death experience yet," he began without preamble.

"Oh no, you? How terrible!" I said sarcastically. Some of Severus' wonderful qualities must be rubbing off on me.

"Yes, but not to fear, I'm here, safe, and don't plan to leave you any time soon," he said, not noting the carelessness I felt for the situation.

"Really? Because I heard you're little 'experience' put some students in the hospital," I lied.

"I never heard about that."

"They're your students. I suppose that's why the headmaster and some Ministry officials are looking for you."

"F-f-for me?" he stuttered.

"Oh, yes. If I were you, I'd lie low for a few days."

"Right then, I was never here." He quickly got up and left, checking each direction in the corridor, truly believing people were looking for him.

"Quite the way to get rid of him, if I do say so myself." Severus said, leaning against the hidden entry to his private quarters.

"Yes, I do have many talents."

"I'm not paying you for your Lockhart removal skills. Did you finish your correcting?" he asked plopping down in the chair behind his desk. "Or were you too occupied with daydreaming?"

"This is your job, you know. I think you're getting lazy."

"That's where you're wrong. I'm not getting lazy, you're simply getting paid," he smirked. I threw several papers at him anyway. "Hey!"

"You know you love me." All was quiet. "What? No retort?" Silence. Hmm, he must be sick. "I'll finish these up. You can have the night off."

"Why?" he asked, arching his signature brow. He never did believe anyone, particularly Slytherins, ever did anything purely out of the goodness of their hearts. There always had to be a hidden agenda.

"I don't want you to get sick because I don't want to teach your classes."

"Who told you I'm sick?"

"No one, it's just that you didn't have a sarcastic remark to my last statement, so I think you must be sick."

"I'm not-" he was cut off when a textbook collided with the side of his head.

"I think some of Lockhart's Cornish Pixies escaped."

"Really, I hadn't noticed?" he said, rubbing the side of his head emphatically.

"Oh, shush, now, how do we catch it and do they make good pets?"

"Why would you want to keep the disgusting thing?"

"It's not disgusting, it's cute. Oh, I should probably figure out if it's a boy or a girl."

"They aren't meant to be pets. And as for catching it, _immobulus._" With that, the tiny pixie was frozen in the air.

"Well, don't hurt it, can I at least let it go in the wild?"

"How did you ever get into Slytherin?"

"I'm sneaky when I want to be."

"Indeed," was all that was said on the matter. I took a small crate off a shelf, placed the Cornish Pixie in it, and walked out of the Potions room, intent on returning him or her to their cage full of friends.

"Ah, Miss Sparks, good afternoon," said Dumbledore, who was standing right around the corner.

"Oh, good afternoon, Headmaster," I said in reply.

"May I inquire about what's in the box?"

"Oh, well, um, Cornish Pixie. I think it escaped from the Defense room. Gilderoy didn't do the best job of keeping them contained."

"No, I must admit, he did not. I, myself had one in my office. Nearly gave poor Fawkes heart failure."

"I can understand that. It attacked Severus with a book."

"Oh, that reminds me, I was coming to see him."

"He's in the classroom, I better get this little guy back to his friends before he wakes up. Good bye, Headmaster."

"Gilderoy, open up," I said, pounding on his office door several floors above the dungeons.

"Who is it?" he hissed through the door.

"It's the Easter Bunny, now open the door, I've got a present for you."

"Ariana, have you finally decided to take me up on my offer?" he asked with a smug smile on his face.

"Not exactly, here you go," I shoved the box into his arms and backed away. Oddly enough, the Cornish Pixie had chosen that moment to wake up and when he opened the box, it flew into his office and began throwing things off shelves, many of which hit Lockhart. "Merry early Christmas!" I shouted cheerily and skipped away. I could still hear crashes from two floors down.

"Lockhart's going to have quite a time cleaning up his office," I said, entering the Potions classroom and shutting the door. "Hello, again, Headmaster."

"Hello, I was just telling Severus that I saw you in the hall on the way to return your little pest."

"Oh, yes, well, it woke up just before he opened the box so now the little pest is his problem." I smiled and sat down at the desk. "Oh, Sevykins! I have no more work, isn't that wonderful?" I knew he hated that name, which is what makes it so much fun to call him that. He gets really mad and a vein in his forehead starts pulsing. Although, if he has an aneurysm, I am out of a job, so I should probably stop. Eh, I'll consider putting on my list of things to do as a new year's resolution. I'll put it right after lose ten pounds and organize my library.

"I told you to stop calling me that, and if you need work, organize the potions stores."

"Oh, I'm sorry Severus, you know I just kid." I gave him a hug and that little vein in his head started pulsing just a little bit more. I think he actually growled. Oh well, he's still my favorite potions master to work for. "Right, well, I'll just go organize those potions stores now. Goodbye again, Headmaster," I said with a smile.

"Don't be too hard on the girl. She means well." I heard Dumbledore say to Severus before I shut the door.

**I'll try to update sooner, but I can't make any promises, sorry. Please review, I may even reply.**


	3. Dreamless?

Disclaimer: Ariana Sparks is the only character I own.

I hadn't realized how long it's been since I wrote, but I will try to update a few more times over the next couple of weeks.

Chapter 3: Dreamless?

"Attention, students!" shouted the Headmaster. "In light of recent events, Professor Lockhart has decided to form a dueling club. Anyone wishing to participate need only sign up on the form in the Main Hall and show up to the designated classroom on Saturday afternoon at 4:00."

The Headmaster was absolutely right. There had been some serious recent events. With Mrs. Norris being petrified, Mr. Filch had become positively paranoid and was out for blood. Then of course there had been the writing on the walls, warning about the release of whatever the Chamber of Secrets contained. Students feared who might be petrified next and teachers were afraid of the possibility the school would be closed. Severus had even expressed concern.

"_The bloody dunderheads wouldn't stand a chance against the monstrous thing that lives down there," he'd told me one evening after dinner. It was his way of saying, "I truly worry for the welfare of the students," though even in that scenario he'd have likely called them dunderheads. _

"_What does live live down there?" I'd asked._

"_No one knows, not even I," he'd replied. "Just, don't be too quick to look something in the eye if you hear anything suspicious."_

"_If you don't know what the creature is, how do you know it's the eyes that are the deadliest?"_

"_Just a hunch based on it being Salazar Slytherin's familiar."_

"_Like a giant snake?"_

"_Bravo, the skills of deduction have not escaped you." He'd pretended to applaud after that. "Just take my advice," he'd said with all seriousness and walked away._

If I didn't know better, I'd have said he was truly concerned about my safety. But that's preposterous, isn't it?

"That's exactly what the students need," he complained during our walk to the dungeons that night.

"What's that?" I asked, thinking I already knew the answer.

"To have that idiot Lockhart encouraging firing spells at one another. I doubt he even knows basic healing spells." It wasn't a vast overstatement to make that assumption, if he'd had a difficult time casting a simple _Immobulus._

"Speaking of said idiot," I indicated Lockahrt standing outside the door to the Potions classroom.

"Ah, Severus, Ariana, good to see you."

"That's Professor Snape to you," said Severus, refusing to acknowledge Lockhart as a colleague, much less an equal.

"Oh, of course," he said, looking slightly taken aback. "My lovely Ariana," he made a move as if to take hold of my hand, but Severus moved into his path.

"What do you want, Lockhart?" he demanded.

"I was wondering if you'd assist me with the dueling club on Saturday." He glared at Severus' shoulder, afraid to meet his eyes while doing such an action.

"Fine," Severus said through clenched teeth. "I had planned to attend anyway as to prevent your idiocy from harming a student. Knocking you on your arse will be a bonus." I openly gaped at Severus. Despite his detest from the man, he'd never openly insulted or threatened him.

"How rude!" exclaimed Lockhart and made to walk back to his quarters. As he passed me, he said, "Be careful, Ariana. He was a Death Eater after all and it's moments like this that you see his true nature."

"Need I remind you, Gilderoy, that my parents were Death Eaters?" I called after him. He seemed to increase his pace at those words. It wasn't a total lie. While they'd both joined only for the sake of spying, they'd both died with the Dark Mark. People assumed they were a Dark Wizard and Witch and no one had bothered to change popular belief. It came in handy when desiring to be left alone; all I needed to do was mention the rumor and any pests disappeared quickly.

When I turned back to the professor, he had a dark look across his face. "You know the truth about your parents' alliance."

"Of course," I said. "It's the same as yours. It's often just simpler to tell people the opposite."

"We joined for entirely different reasons," he said, a pained expression now burdening his features.

"But you remained for nobler ones," I said, with genuine concern. I'd lost count of the number of times I'd had to defend him not only to others, but especially to himself. "I don't have the energy to drag you out of a moat of self-pity tonight so don't even go there. I'll leave a vial of Dreamless Sleep on your nightstand." This was the best way to handle his bouts of self-loathing. Don't coddle, but don't speak harshly enough to push him further in. "Goodnight," I said pressing my lips to his cheek. It still served to make his face tinge the slightest shade of pink, proving he was at least remaining in the present.

With any luck, he'd be refreshed and as pleasant as he can be by morning. I'd never told Severus, but I'd been altering the batches of Dreamless Sleep I made for him for years. Ordinarily, it removes REM sleep entirely, actually making the person more exhausted. But with the alteration of just one ingredient and an extra 10 stirs counterclockwise, he had a blissful night's sleep, with dreams. It's not my fault he never seem to recall any of them.

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	4. Emergency

Disclaimer: Nothing except Ariana Sparks belongs to me.

Chapter 4: Emergency?

Saturday came quickly, a little too quickly for my tastes. In spite of not liking Lockhart, I feared what Severus might do during a duel with the DADA professor. Of course he wouldn't use any curses or serious hexes on the other teacher, but even a simple "Expelliarmus" could cause damage if cast with enough force. I had no doubts that Severus was in fact capable of such force.

"Just don't kill him," I remind Severus on the way to the unused classroom that was specified on the bulletin board in the Main Hall.

"What a ridiculous notion," he says with a snort of derision. "At any rate, that bloody fool is enough of a threat to himself that it would be a waste of time to target him in such a manner."

"The point I'm making is that I doubt I have enough influence in the Wizarding World to stop the Ministry from sending you to Azkaban if you cause bodily harm to their favorite celebrity." He guffawed at that idea. "Show all the condescension you want at the idea, but the fact remains that there are a large number of witches, and some wizards, that would give their last galleon to have just one night with the 'bloody fool.'"

"And I suppose that includes you. You'd certainly sacrifice a lot of galleons to achieve that aspiration," he drawled.

"I did not mean... Oh, you're impossible!"

"I'm afraid you're mistaken. I'm improbable but do exist ruling out any impossibility."

My reply was cut short by Lockhart saying, "Ariana! How courteous of you to come. I know you'll be very impressed by my agenda for the first meeting. Snape," he said, nodding curtly to the Potions Master.

"Again, that's _Professor_ Snape," he countered, refusing to allow Lockhart to drop the formality. "Lockhart," he added without the proper title, adding further insult to the bumbling baffoon.

_'Hmm, that insult was something I usually reserve for student's essays. Perhaps I should take a vacation, get away from correcting papers in enough red ink to rival Severus' policy.'_ I mentally shrug, storing that though away for consideration at a later time.

"I'm here only because of Severus," I informed him, squashing his hopes that I'm there because he'd like me to be, and, hopefully, deterring him from making any advances after the dueling session.

We entered the classroom to see a large stage had been set up, with close to fifty students milling around it.

"Gather round! Gather round!" Lockhart calls with a smile. "Can everyone see me? Can you all hear me? Excellent!" he goes on to inform students of the importance of being able to defend oneself. "For full details, see my published works."

"Cocky bastard, isn't he?" I whisper to Severus out of the corner of my mouth.

"Mmm," is his only response.

"Now, you all know my assistant, Professor Snape." He made sure to emphasize the 'Professor' as he didn't want Severus telling him off in front of the students. At the mention of "assistant" however, Severus' lips form an even thinner line, showing his anger at not being the one instructing. I immediately start making a mental list of everyone that owes me favors, in case he really does kill the idiot.

"Not to worry, though, I assure you, you'll still have your Potions Master when I'm through with him."

"We may be in need of a DADA teacher though," I mutter under my breath. Years of teaching and punishing wrongdoers have made Severus' hearing attuned enough to hear me, though, and I see the slightest smirk through his greasy curtain of hair. It's not his fault his hair looks that way. It's from standing over a cauldron for hours. Madame Pomfrey's needed extra potions lately and the first batch of mandrake has matured, though many were devoured by slugs.

I invented a shampoo that lessens the effects of the cauldron's fumes, but Severus refuses to use it, saying I'm vain for caring about my appearance so much. Personally, I think he fears acquiring the lilac smell of the formula. Every variation produces the same scent, however, and in one trial my hair turned as bushy as Miss Granger's. Needless to say, I've quit my attempts on changing the results.

I'm forced back to the present by screaming girls. Lovely, Lockhart's undressing, throwing his cloak to some over-anxious second years. Severus, knowing it will annoy Lockhart to no end, removes his own cloak and throws it to me, leaving him in his frock coat. I make a noise to imitate the prepubescent girls that had been giggling earlier and see Lockhart's eyes widen and lips purse.

Looking at Severus, I notice his brow arched in question. I roll my eyes and shake my head softly. I need to add this moment to my smile count. It's a little more than a smirk and he seems genuinely happy at the sight of Gilderoy's expression. For being such a coward, I'm certain that look could scare away a banshee.

"Right," Lockhart says, clearing his throat. "First, you bow to your opponent," he instructs the students. The two wizards bow to each other and walk to their respective ends of the stage.

Just as Lockhart opens his mouth, Severus shouts "Expelliarmus" and the blond wizard is thrown onto his arse just as Severus said he'd be. I manage to stop myself from laughing, but can't hide my smile.

While Lockhart tries to defend himself against his lack of defense skills, I take a moment to observe the students. Potter's arm has apparently healed; there are bones in it once more. Draco Malfoy is smirking at the turn of events; and over half the students look disheartened at their "hero" being totally useless in battle.

The meeting passes somewhat uneventfully after that, with Malfoy and Potter once again at each other's throats in their rivalry. The peacefulness of the day is destroyed, however, when it's discovered that Potter is a Parselmouth.

The students (many of them in Severus' house) that are present immediately start whispering frantically, speculating that Potter _must_ be the heir of Slytherin. So much for the subtlety of Slytherins.

"I can't believe that Potter would be the heir of Slytherin," I quietly tell Severus on the walk back to the dungeons.

"He's not," Severus hisses back, looking around for any students that could be listening in on our conversations. As we rounded a corner a young first year, who had been walking toward us previously, turned and ran in the direction from which he came.

"How do you know?" I asked. I almost felt bad for the student, but he would need to adapt to Severus' behavior and realize the Potions Master wouldn't harm a student, much.

"Because the Potters have bragged for generations about being direct descendents of Gryffindor and having absolutely no family ties to dark wizards, especially Slytherin," he sneered.

"No one can be that certain of their ancestry. There are always a few nuts in every family tree."

"Nicely put, but I still doubt that there is any possibility of Potter being Salazar Slytherin's heir." When we reached the potions classroom, Severus held the door open for me. Professor Dumbledore was sitting in one of the student's desks, leafing through a potions journal. When he saw us, he leapt to his feet.

"Severus! I've been waiting, there's an emergency with which I require your immediate assistance."

"What is the emergency, Headmaster?" I inquire nervously. When he admits to the possibility of an emergency, it really must be serious.

"You need not worry, Miss Sparks," he said, "I only need Severus' assistance. Why don't you take the night off?"

"Alright," I said to an empty room, as the two men had already rushed out the door. "Well, that was odd." I continue pondering what the emergency could possibly be as I walk to my bedroom; the essays could wait till morning.

* * *

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	5. What Emergency?

**I can't believe how long it's been since I updated. Thank you to any readers that have stuck with this story and continue to read it.**

I took Dumbledore's suggestion to take the night off, soaking for an hour in the large sunken tub that came standard in all teachers' quarters. After that, an at-home mani-pedi seemed in order. I was halfway through the top coat when Severus stormed in, a murderous expression on his face.

"What was the emergency?" I asked looking over the top of my nails.

"Emergency?" he asked and laughed. He stared at me for what seemed like forever. At first I thought he was mad for doing my nails in the study, but he turned and walked into his bedroom, slamming the door behind him.

"That was weird even for him," I muttered. I finished my nails and tiptoed to his bedroom door. Debating whether to knock, I had just decided to walk away when the door flew open.

"What," he spat, "do you want?" I only shrugged.

"I wanted to know what the emergency was."

"It doesn't concern you." He went to shut the door, but I held it open.

"What's wrong? Did you kill Lockhart and I didn't know about it? Do I need to be expecting aurors breaking down the door any minute?"

"I did not kill Lockhart! Suffice it to say, Dumbledore is a meddling old coot!" With that, he did shut his door, my fingers barely escaping the opening before the latch clicked and lock slid into place.

"But that could mean anything!" I wailed at the closed door. "I'll find out what happened eventually!"

"Go to bed, Ariana!" I heard him shout from the other side.

I hmphed and stomped my way to my bedroom. A thing everyone should know is that a pureblood witch will never take 'no' for an answer. _'I could always try slipping Veritaserum into his morning coffee.'_ I pondered the ways to accomplish this as I drifted off to sleep.

The next morning, I awoke to find that Severus had already left. It must have really been something he didn't want me to find out about, which of course only made me want to know what the emergency was all the more.

"Good morning, Ariana," Professor McGonagall said as I sat down at the staff table.

"What's so good about it?" I grumbled.

"Dear, I think some of Severus' qualities have rubbed off on you."

"Oh, I'm sorry Minerva. It's just that Severus won't tell me what the emergency is that Dumbledore needed assistance with last night. He seemed quite upset when he got back."

"I told Albus that it was a bad idea, but did he listen? Apparently not!" When Minerva was angry, her Scottish brogue became more pronounced.

"What did the headmaster do, Minerva?"

"He set Severus up on a blind date." For some reason, the thought of Severus on a date bothered me. I brushed this feeling off, storing it away for later consideration.

"No wonder he was angry. I don't think he's been on a date in the last four years." He chose that minute to walk into the Great Hall.

I must have been staring because he barked "What!" at me as he sat down.

"I'm sorry, Severus. If I had known you had been set up on a date, I would have never been so nosy. How'd it go?" For a reason I didn't care to analyze, my supportive attitude left a foul taste in my mouth.

"How do you think it went?" He stabbed a sausage with enough force I was surprised when the plate was still intact. "She was tall, blonde, had a chest that was clearly altered, though she kept telling me throughout the meal that it was natural, and only talked about sex and money."

"So she was a bimbo."

"A gold-digging one. Are we done with this conversation?" he gave me a sad look, well as sad as Snape can look. "I'd like to forget last night ever happened and move on with my life." I nodded. "Nice nails," he muttered through the corner of his mouth so no one else would hear. It was as close to "Thank you for being such a wonderful friend" as he'd ever get.

"Thanks," I said finishing my breakfast. "I'll be in the classroom. I offered a few students some extra help with studying for the test."

"Why would you do something like that?" he asked, sounding appalled.

"Don't worry, they're Slytherins." It seemed to appease him. They weren't all Slytherins, two were from Ravenclaw, but hey, Ravenclaws are just Slytherins that no one expects to misbehave. It's always the quiet ones you need to watch out for.

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	6. Veronica

**Yay, two updates in two days. Enjoy!**

"Who can tell me the difference between an elixir and a philter?" I asked the small group of second years. No one raised their hands. They really did need help.

"Alright, Malfoy, if you can give me an answer in ten seconds, I'll give Slytherin ten points. Sound fair?"

"Trick question, there is no difference."

"Wrong!" I said, making a buzzing noise. "Thank you for playing, but that's not the right answer. How did you kids even make it to second year without knowing this?"

A small Ravenclaw girl raised her hand.

"Yes?"

"An elixir can be used as medicine, while a philter is used to charm the person that consumes it," she said in a near whisper.

"Great! Ten points to Ravenclaw. Don't be afraid to answer, when you know what it is."

"That was my ten points!" Malfoy shouted.

"I offered you ten points if you knew the answer, you didn't so the ten points went to the person that answered. If you have another outburst, Mr. Malfoy, I'll give you detention… with Filch," I added as an afterthought. He shut up after that. Mr. Filch may be a squib, but when it came to keeping the students in line, he seemed to have some powers of his own. The study session went well enough after that, though I had doubts about the potion-making abilities of many of these students. It was obvious already, that this test would have more red ink than I'd had to use in some time.

"Miss Sparks," Severus said, as the last student exited the room. "I thought you said they were all Slytherins."

"Technically, I only said 'they are Slytherins'. I never specified or gave any reason to assume they were _all_ Slytherins."

"Ah, there's that devious side that makes you a Slytherin."

"I do what I can. By the way, you better buy some more red ink. I only have ten bottles left." With that, I left the room to do inventory of the ingredients. The first class of the day wasn't until 10:00 and it was Gryffindor. I try not to discriminate against specific houses, like Severus does, but it's plain to see that some simply didn't have as much potential as others. Those Weasley twins showed promise though. They were the only students that had never blown anything up…accidentally. The exploding cauldrons in their third year were completely planned, or so I'm told.

"Alright, Weasley, detention for a month!" I heard Severus shouting from the classroom. I couldn't help laughing as I walked in and saw him sprawled on the floor, his desk chair having given way.

"I swear, sir," started one.

"We didn't do it!" finished the other.

"Then who did?" Snape demanded, brushing the dirt off his robes. "This is not funny!" he told me, as I couldn't contain the giggles anymore. His hair was disheveled and it was hilarious. I'll run away screaming from his glare later, but for now, laughing was necessary. I noticed a paper lying on the floor next to his chair.

"_Thanks for last night! Veronica"_

"Who's Veronica?"

"No one," he said as he snatched the paper away.

"Oh, is she the blonde?"

"Yes," he said quietly.

"Do you think she's the one that set up your chair to break?"

"In the words of muggles, no shit Sherlock."

"Yep, you're definitely back to your normal self. Now, teach your class and don't sit on anything without a diagnostic spell first." I sat down at my own desk, after my own diagnostic spell. Veronica must not have anything against me because my chair was untouched. Maybe she's not as dumb as Severus thought she was, and doesn't believe what's written in the Daily Prophet.

'_Then again,'_ I reconsider, as the bottle of ink explodes in my face, _'maybe she is that stupid and had other plans for me._' Great, now Severus was laughing at me. _'You're a pureblood,'_ I remind myself._ 'Just get up, with dignity, and walk out, with dignity. Then, run as fast as you can to the nearest bathroom to wash this goop off!'_

"It's a walking tomato!" squeals Moaning Myrtle. "Hello, Ariana."

"I'm not in the mood, Myrtle, so don't talk unless you have something helpful to say."

"Oh, you're in a mood. I thought you looked a little 'red in the face'." She floated away, whooping with laughter.

"Stupid ghosts!" I mutter. Normally, Myrtle and I get along very well, but she has an annoying habit of adding insult to injury. A sudden odor struck me. "It smells like… Polyjuice Potion." I glanced around, but saw no one. I looked in every single stall, including one that Myrtle flew out of. I swear, ghosts must have quotas of how many other people they can get to join the undead through scaring them to death. Whatever smelled like Polyjuice was nowhere to be found, and the smell was quite a bit weaker than it had been.

'_How odd.'_

"Oh, Ariana," Myrtle called.

"Myrtle, I said be quiet."

"Okay, I just thought you'd like to know Lockhart heard about the ink and he's heading this way to find you."

"Thank you, Myrtle. Have I told you you're my favorite ghost?"

"Anytime. Thanks for egging Olive Hornby's house for me!"

"How'd you know it was me?"

"I heard about the pink toilet paper in the trees." With that, Myrtle dived into her stall, the one with the roll of pink toilet paper.

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	7. Offers Made

**Thank you so much to my wonderful reviewers. It means so much to me that you all like this story. **

"Ah, Miss Sparks, you decided to once again grace us with your presence?" Severus drawled when I reentered the classroom. I only glared. "You know, perhaps I should give you a detention for leaving the room without permission, and set a precedent for the students."

"Go ahead and give me a detention," I said, still glaring. "I'll just write Veronica a nice little letter, telling her that I've released my claim on you, and you'd like another shot at dating her." I smiled the nicest smile I could.

"You missed some ink on the side of your neck," he informed me, refusing to let the incident go without some comment. I didn't move. "Fine, don't believe me."

As soon as he'd walked away, I transfigured a quill into a small mirror and examined my neck. _'Liar,'_ I thought, stashing the mirror away before he saw.

I must have been gone longer than I thought because the class that had been fourth year Gryffindors was now third year Hufflepuffs and Ravenclaws. I looked at the recipe for the potion they were making today, the Ice Potion.

"Really, Severus?" I asked when he came back to stand next to his desk. I noticed his chair still lay in ruins on the floor. "The Ice Potion?"

"Why not?" he asked, clearly not really paying me any attention. "The Stone has been removed from the castle, so it's safe now to teach them this formula. If you'll notice, I've also taken your research and altered the recipe so that it protects against nearly all fires, not just black fire."

"It still doesn't work against Fiendfyre," I said sadly. Fiendfyre had been one of the spells used against my father when he was discovered. Severus observed the students a moment before placing his hand on my shoulder.

"Very few potions or incantations can defend against dark spells. That's why Potter's the only one to ever survive the killing curse," he told me, spitting the name as though it burned his tongue. He quickly withdrew his hand as a Hufflepuff turned to look at us. "Get back to work!"

Ever uncomfortable with displaying emotions, human emotions anyway, Severus ignored me the rest of the day. He even made a point of not sitting next to me at lunch, causing me to sit next to Professor Sprout.

"How are you, dear?" she asked me, her naturally maternal personality shining through.

"I'm fine, Pomona, I hear your mandrakes are doing well?"

"OH! You heard. Yes, since Hagrid was so kind as to spray them all for slugs, they're doing quite well." And so began a fifteen minute, one-sided, conversation on why and how to properly grow mandrakes, with me just nodding and saying "Oh no," or "how lovely" when she'd pause for breath. Don't get me wrong, Pomona's a wonderful, caring woman, but at the slightest mention of plants, she can give more information about them than you'd find in an encyclopedia.

"Severus isn't sitting with you today?" she asked as she finished her speech.

I realized I'd droned out the last five minutes and felt guilty. "Um, no, he's acting a little odd since our second class today."

"I heard he tried to give you a detention," she whispered, scandalized. "If you were my assistant, I'd never do something so… so… rude!"

"It's not so bad working for him," I assured her. I could never understand why Severus seemed to get such a bad rap with the other teachers. Maybe it was just my dark sense of humor that allowed me to fully appreciate him.

"If you ever want a change, you can come work for me," she said with a smile.

"Thanks, Pomona, but plants aren't really my area of expertise." If I had to spend an entire day in a greenhouse with her, I may end up putting a wand in my mouth and shouting "Avada Kedavra". I'm sure I could conjure up enough self-hatred for accepting such a position.

"Well, if you ever change your mind, you know where to find me."

"Miss Sparks," Severus greeted on his way out of the Great Hall. _'At least he's done ignoring me.'_

"I'd love to stay and chat, Pomona, but I have about a hundred students to write feedback for of exactly why their potion is useless, so if you'll excuse me."

"Have a nice night, Ariana," she said, turning to McGonagall on her other side.

Two hours and over a hundred corrections later, I was finally done informing the students of _why_ they were failures, at least in potions. It was so unfair that Severus got to tell the Slytherins what they did well on their potions and I got stuck with everyone that he didn't think had what it took to be a great potion-brewer, which in his opinion seemed to be three-quarters of the school. Ironically, he deemed the Weasley twins as two promising brewers and actually gave them an E on their potions.

"You know, I could have finished sooner if you had helped grade the dunderheads' potions." He'd been done grading for forty-five minutes and was reading a potions journal.

"Perhaps, but then what would be the point of my paying you?"

"To be graced with my lovely appearance each day!" His reply was a snort of laughter. "Hey! It's not that laughable."

"I concur," we heard from the doorway.

"What do you want, Lockhart?" Severus asked, raising a brow.

"I simply came to check on my dearest Ariana."

"Your _dearest_ Ariana," Severus smirked. "Hear that, Miss Sparks? You're his _dearest_ Ariana. I wonder how many Ariana's he knows." The last part was said quietly enough for only me to hear.

"Yes, darling," he said, taking my hand. "I heard that someone caused a red inkwell to explode in your face today." He glanced at Severus with a constipated look I assumed was meant to be a glare. "Are you quite alright?"

"Yes, great, never better. Thanks for checking in, goodnight," I said, making to stand up and walk to the Potions quarters. Gilderoy kept a grip on my arm though.

"I thought you might want to have a guardian around, you know, in case that mad woman comes back for you?" He waggled his eyebrows, suggesting something more than just protection.

"Thanks, Gilderoy," I said, ignoring his leers and extracting my arm from his grip. "But I have a wand and know how to use it."

"But Ariana," he scolded, "this woman got into the potions classroom, nee she was willing to set foot in the potions classroom, to attack not only you but… him as well." It was obvious Lockhart wanted nothing more than to insult Severus, but held his tongue, knowing he would lose that muscle if he uttered a single syllable.

"Again, I can protect myself. If all else fails, I'll throw a cauldron at her head. I was a chaser on the Slytherin Quidditch team after all. Goodnight," I told the two men and left the potions room in search of my fluffy slippers and robe. I know, they aren't very Slytherin of me, but the robe is green so I tried. At least they aren't Gryffindor colors. Severus would fire me on the spot if I slept in red and gold.

"Why did you tell Lockhart you were the chaser on the quidditch team?" Severus asked when he entered the study.

"I was! Remember? It was my fourth year, the year when no one else tried out, and they had to choose me or they couldn't play."

"You weren't an actual player though."  
"I was on a broom."

"If I recall, you were told by the captain to fly around the pitch, making it look like you were playing, but if you actually touched the quaffle, he'd wrap you in raw fish and give you to the giant squid."

"And if I recall, it was when the quaffle bounced off my head, into the goal, that we won the game and everyone in Slytherin thought I was a hero."

"You were in a coma for a week!"

"I still won," I said, and walked into my bedroom, slamming the door with enough vigor to rival Severus' actions after his date.

"Oh very mature, just walk away! Why am I arguing with a closed door?" I heard him mutter and seconds later, I heard his own door shut. I giggled at the image that popped into my head, Severus Snape fighting with a door. I was still smiling as I fell asleep, thinking of him.

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	8. Realizations

**This is the longest chapter I've written yet. I hope you like it. As always, thanks so much to my wonderful reviewers. Your feedback is most appreciated.**

The next morning was a Saturday, a peaceful day, a day without classes, a day without dunderheads, a day with-

'_Oh, crap,'_ I thought, remembering today is the day of the Gryffindor-Slytherin Quidditch match. As a staff member, former Slytherin, and former quidditch player, it seems obligatory that I attend. '_At least it should be interesting since it's Malfoy's first game.'_ I know I shouldn't wish bad things about the students, especially Slytherins, but I really hope I get to see Malfoy knocked off his broom, or hit with a bludger, or something similar. It only seems fair after having to put up with his snotty remarks and arrogant attitude for the last… has it really only been a year and a half? It seems like longer.

"Are you ready yet?" Severus asked as he knocked on the door.

"Not quite," I tell him, rushing to my closet and throwing on the first pair of robes I could find. I grabbed my coat and scarf and headed for the door. Holding my scarf between my teeth, I yanked a brush through my hair a couple of times before looking in the mirror.

'_Not bad,'_ I thought with relief. "Ready," I informed him, opening the door.

"And it only took five minutes," he said with a smirk.

"How did you know?" I looked back into the mirror to make sure I hadn't missed something important, like pants.

"You've overslept for nearly every quidditch game since you became my assistant."

"I hadn't realized that," I said quietly. "You must have a really great memory."

"Yes, memory," he muttered, not quite meeting my eyes. "Let's get to breakfast." He turned swiftly on his heel and I had to jog to keep up.

"You know, not everyone's as tall as you. Would you slow down? Please?" I was never a morning person and being forced to run would really be a bad start to my day. He didn't answer me, but slowed his pace slightly. "It should be an interesting game," I said trying to make small talk. "What with the new brooms and all."

"Indeed."

"Why are you so quiet this morning?" Usually, he's excited on the days that Slytherin has a quidditch match. No one else would know the signs, but when Severus is anticipating something, he becomes really talkative and even makes jokes, the Snape version of jokes anyway. They normally involve new torture methods for detentions, which can be funny.

"I have no idea what you mean." As if to prove his point, he said, "How well do you think it would go over if I got a giant cauldron, had a student stand in it for an hour, letting them believe I was going to use them in a potion. Then, of course, after the hour was over, I'd let them go, having learned their lesson?"

"I've never been so happy to have graduated."

He smirked. "I'd only use it on the most important of occasions, for instance if a student is caught stealing from my stores."

"You go ahead and do that, I'll scrape together some money for bail."

We sat down at the staff table, each of us pouring a large cup of coffee. Unfortunately for me, there was an empty chair to my right. I felt a tap on my shoulder. "Oh what fresh hell is this?" I groaned, turning.

"Good morning, Ariana!" Lockhart said cheerfully. "Is anyone sitting here?"

"Yes, actually!"  
"Oh?" He was clearly shocked with this new information.

"Yes, my invisible friend named Steve. I've been neglecting him lately and feel just terrible. I'm sure you understand."

"You have an invisible friend named Steve?" he asked in amazement. I noticed Severus was watching our interaction with fascination.

"I know, you must think I'm crazy. I'll completely understand if you don't want o speak to me anymore and withdraw your offer of wooing me." I smiled, knowing there was no one who could possibly want to remain my friend if you believed I had an imaginary friend named Steve.

"Quite the opposite actually." My smile faltered and I could feel my eyes growing wide. "I too, have an invisible friend. His name is Ken. He has an outfit for every occasion and has a girlfriend named Barbara."

"You mean like the muggle toys, Barbie and Ken?" I knew Lockhart was stupid as a rock but even he couldn't be this mental, could he?

"You know them?" he whispered excitedly.

"No," I said in a deadpan voice.

"Aw, I thought you might be able to introduce me!"

"You mean, _you_ don't know your imaginary friends?"

"I tried to introduce myself you know, but they just ignored me. I even smiled my most charming smile at them, the one that won me the award."

"Well, there they are now, just walked out of the Great Hall. I bet if you hurry you can catch them." He looked gleefully at the door and took off at a sprint.

"Ken! Ken! Wait, I love you!"

I turned back to see Severus biting his lip to keep from laughing.

"If you end up biting your tongue off, I'm not reattaching it," I warned him. He turned serious again in an instant and glared at me. "You're welcome."

"For what?"

"First, for making you laugh, which I am certain will be the high point of your day. Second, for making you stop laughing or you may very well have bit your tongue off from the effort of staying silent." I smiled into my coffee cup. The house elves always made the French roast on days when there was a quidditch game.

"Um, thank you."

"I live to serve."

"How very Slytherin of you," he said sarcastically. I stuck out my tongue at him. He chose to ignore the action and took a bite of a bagel.

"I'm surprised the most charming smile failed on Barbie," I said a few minutes later. Severus left out a bark of laughter before he could stop himself. Every student that was in the hall turned to look, fear written on the majority of their faces.

"I hate you," Severus murmured out of the corner of his mouth.

"No you don't," I said, keeping my gaze on my plate. "You just hate being the center of attention." Most people believed he was antisocial, but the truth was he was just selective of who he spent time with. I'd learned long ago that, while he liked receiving praise for his brilliance, he didn't like large quantities of people watching him. "Besides, I'm not the one who laughed. You usually have more self-control." Oh, look, that vein in his forehead is pulsing again. '_Gee, his hand looks like it's getting closer to that butter knife.'_ "You know, it's such a gorgeous day, I think I'll take a walk before the match. See ya!" With that, I practically ran from the table, in fear of death by butter knife.

An hour later, I found myself sitting in the stands surrounding the quidditch pitch.

"Why did you rush out of the great hall this morning?" Severus asked, sitting next to me.

"Are you serious?" I asked. He only looked confused. "You were reaching for your butter knife."

"Yes, to spread cream cheese on my bagel. It seemed dry this morning. What did you think I was doing?"

"I thought you were going to stab me with it!" I laughed at my own stupidity, but stopped when he just sat there staring at me with a brow raised. "What?" He didn't respond. I snapped my fingers in front of him and shook his shoulder.

"Huh?" he asked, coming out of his daze.

"What were you thinking about?"

"Nothing!" he said quickly.

"Yes, I forgot, 'nothing' is known for putting people in a near comatose state."

"Uh, yes," he said, "let's just watch the match then, shall we?"

I turned toward the pitch, but kept observing him out of the corner of my eye. He was acting odd. He hadn't acted this awkwardly around me since I was fifteen and he decided we needed to have "the talk". It was hilarious watching the many shades of red his face could turn as he tried to explain everything without ever once using the technical words for the reproductive organs.

Today, though, seemed different. He was quiet, but yet it seemed like he _wanted_ to tell me something. Lucius Malfoy happened to be sitting in the teacher's stand. He turned to speak to Severus as we waited for the match to start.

"Severus, how have you been?" Malfoy asked.

"I've been well, and you?"

"Well enough. Narcissa's been dragging me to one charity ball after another. You're so lucky you never got married."

"Yes, lucky," Severus agreed, though he no longer sounded as happy uttering this statement as he once did.

"Ah, Miss Sparks, Draco told me you threatened to give him a detention," Lucius said, turning to me.

"He deserved it."

"I'm sure he did," he said, turning back to Severus. Lucius Malfoy had never particularly liked me, probably because my parents were spies. The more likely case though is that I refused to sell the controlling shares of my parents' companies to him. I don't regret that decision though, knowing full well he'd have corrupted the good work they'd done in their lifetime.

"You're losing your touch, Severus," I heard him saying. It was quite obvious from the expression on Malfoy's face that they were discussing the date that had been forced upon Severus. Knowing Lucius, he was probably telling him he should have slept with the blonde bimbo. The idea made me sick. Severus had better taste than that; he was a teacher. It was his duty to set a positive example for the students. Some voice in the back of my mind, however, screamed that this wasn't the reason I felt nauseous every time I thought of him with that woman.

"You like him," the voice seemed to whisper in my ear.

"_Shut up!" _I thought. _'Great, now I'm arguing with myself.'_ I suppose the bright side of arguing with myself is that I'm guaranteed to win the argument somehow. If I don't, then I really have problems. _'I don't like him.'_

"Oh, but you do," the voice in the back of my mind whispered. "Just look at him for a moment and try to deny it."

'_I really don't. I mean, sure, he's good looking, if a bit intimidating. He's brilliant, he's funny, even if only I see it. He's one of the greatest potions masters, likely of the millennium, but that doesn't mean that I like him.'_ He suddenly turned to look at me. When his eyes met mine, it hit me like a ton of bricks, _'Oh sweet Merlin, I like him!'_

I turned away quickly, hoping he hadn't seen into my mind in those two seconds my Occlumency walls were down. I felt my face burning in embarrassment.

"Are you feeling okay?" he asked, noticing my red face. I felt his cool fingers gently touch my cheek. "You feel warm." It was in these rare moments, when he was greatly concerned about my wellbeing, in which he threw caution to the wind, and didn't care who saw him acting like a human. I was about to lean into his hand, the recent discovery making my mind feel fuzzy and no longer in control of my actions. He seemed to remember where we were just then and yanked his hand away as if burned. He was silent for the rest of the match. It was just as well, leaving me to my own thoughts, to try to rationalize this newfound information.

Near the end of the game, I got my wish answered as Malfoy flew off of his broom and landed hard on his backside. I almost felt bad for the kid though, as his father acted ashamed of him after that. When another wizard had asked him if his son was alright, he said it wasn't his son. Like the white blond hair didn't give away the connection. I wondered if I kicked him in the back of the head right now, if he'd believe my foot slipped. I was about to do it too, when a hush fell over the crowd.

"Harry Potter has caught the snitch!" the commentator shouted. "Gryffindor wins!"

"I am feeling a little under the weather," I said to Severus as we descended the stairs from the stands. "I think I'm going to go take a nap."

"I'll get you some soup from the kitchens on my way back to the dungeons," he whispered so no one else would hear. "I need to go check on Draco first." I nodded, knowing his own father wouldn't go near the hospital wing to comfort his son. I had never understood before why Severus always seemed to give special attention to Draco. I had always believed it was just another way to show favoritism to Slytherin. It made sense now though that as Draco's godfather, Severus played the role of 'father' at times too.

'_It's just another reason to like him,' _I thought, walking back to the castle. _'Yes, I like him,'_ I admitted to the annoying voice, which seemed to be much quieter now.

"Took you long enough," it said, before becoming completely silent.

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